Nome: You remember something, you forget something. Something knows both the forgetfulness and the knowing, now that it is interesting to inquire into.
Me: Umm, what was I going to ask? Umm.
Nome: You forgot. (everyone including Nome laughs)
Me: What is it you were just saying, because I had something, on the, umm, what was it you were just saying?
Nome: About forgetfulness and rememberance of thought, and the one who knows both.
Me; Oh I know what it was.
I have alot of, I attempt inquiry as we've talked about and sometimes I get to a really illumined state where things are really blissful and alot of times what happens and it was happening in here too is the room becomes very like glowing. And I know those are experiences with a beginning and an end. I know that sort of. Ya know like, it is very hard for me to distinguish sometimes, how do I know that i'm inquiring in a way that is actually deep? How do I know this is a sign that I am getting deeper or this is like a dullness, a stupor, a tamasic state. I think sometimes I have a little trouble distinguishing something that is in the wrong direction and something that is really going in a more deep, blissful. Other then, when I've been around here, in this general vacinity, walking around, ya know, I'm thinking alot and sometimes I'm thinking about alot of different people and things but there is this intense sense of deep contentment and bliss that regardless of whether I'm getting closer to Realization or not or any of that stuff, I am happy to just be in that state of bliss and continuing to be in it regardless of what's happening. So I guess my question is, maybe, how do I distinguish? Like when I get in a deeper state, there are states where I'm really blissful, the room is glowing, there is pretty much no thought as far as I can tell. But sometimes there are different kind of visual things like maybe I'll be looking in one of the spiritual books and the letter will be doing weird things (everyone including me laughs). That's in general the gist of my question, I guess.
Nome: A few points. Bliss can never be wrong. So one need not doubt whether it's correct to be blissful or to be happy or not. Secondly, just forming the right spiritual intention, inwardly acting upon it. Propelling your life in a profound direction. This in itself will give a great happiness even while other thoughts are still going on. Your thinking about things and people, etc. Because something deeper is at work. That something deeper is the call of your own self. Now you want to pursue that call completely. So whatever happens. Whatever visual things like you describe happen. There is no harm in such, of course. But continue to inquire. The room gets brighter. By what light do you know the brightness of the room?
Me: By what light do I know the brightness of the room? (I giggle, spiritually drunk).
Inquiring into the sense of me, the I. The I-thought, to me it seems like it's less of a thought and more just the general sense that there's a me that's perceiving something.
Nome: That's right. That's correct. A me, that can be a perceiver, but the me can be there without perception.
Me: yeah. So it would be arising to the sense of me as seeing the glowing room.
Nome: So if the room is a-glow, or if the room is not a-glow, either way, you will want to trace that perception to the perceiver apart from which it cannot even exist. And then seek out the nature of the perceiver, and thereby your inquiry will stay on the right track no matter what things you see, hear, what have you, whether things are as you might regard as normal everyday or very strikingly unusual. Either way, keep your focus on the one who knows it. If you do that, your inquiry will be a strong current inside and you won't umm, stagnate.
Nome gazes at me benevolently.
Me: Umm, what was I going to ask? Umm.
Nome: You forgot. (everyone including Nome laughs)
Me: What is it you were just saying, because I had something, on the, umm, what was it you were just saying?
Nome: About forgetfulness and rememberance of thought, and the one who knows both.
Me; Oh I know what it was.
I have alot of, I attempt inquiry as we've talked about and sometimes I get to a really illumined state where things are really blissful and alot of times what happens and it was happening in here too is the room becomes very like glowing. And I know those are experiences with a beginning and an end. I know that sort of. Ya know like, it is very hard for me to distinguish sometimes, how do I know that i'm inquiring in a way that is actually deep? How do I know this is a sign that I am getting deeper or this is like a dullness, a stupor, a tamasic state. I think sometimes I have a little trouble distinguishing something that is in the wrong direction and something that is really going in a more deep, blissful. Other then, when I've been around here, in this general vacinity, walking around, ya know, I'm thinking alot and sometimes I'm thinking about alot of different people and things but there is this intense sense of deep contentment and bliss that regardless of whether I'm getting closer to Realization or not or any of that stuff, I am happy to just be in that state of bliss and continuing to be in it regardless of what's happening. So I guess my question is, maybe, how do I distinguish? Like when I get in a deeper state, there are states where I'm really blissful, the room is glowing, there is pretty much no thought as far as I can tell. But sometimes there are different kind of visual things like maybe I'll be looking in one of the spiritual books and the letter will be doing weird things (everyone including me laughs). That's in general the gist of my question, I guess.
Nome: A few points. Bliss can never be wrong. So one need not doubt whether it's correct to be blissful or to be happy or not. Secondly, just forming the right spiritual intention, inwardly acting upon it. Propelling your life in a profound direction. This in itself will give a great happiness even while other thoughts are still going on. Your thinking about things and people, etc. Because something deeper is at work. That something deeper is the call of your own self. Now you want to pursue that call completely. So whatever happens. Whatever visual things like you describe happen. There is no harm in such, of course. But continue to inquire. The room gets brighter. By what light do you know the brightness of the room?
Me: By what light do I know the brightness of the room? (I giggle, spiritually drunk).
Inquiring into the sense of me, the I. The I-thought, to me it seems like it's less of a thought and more just the general sense that there's a me that's perceiving something.
Nome: That's right. That's correct. A me, that can be a perceiver, but the me can be there without perception.
Me: yeah. So it would be arising to the sense of me as seeing the glowing room.
Nome: So if the room is a-glow, or if the room is not a-glow, either way, you will want to trace that perception to the perceiver apart from which it cannot even exist. And then seek out the nature of the perceiver, and thereby your inquiry will stay on the right track no matter what things you see, hear, what have you, whether things are as you might regard as normal everyday or very strikingly unusual. Either way, keep your focus on the one who knows it. If you do that, your inquiry will be a strong current inside and you won't umm, stagnate.
Nome gazes at me benevolently.
Journal
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